NEW YORK — Upper West Side dry cleaner Mahmoud Hassan is holding Larry David’s suits hostage until “Bernie Sanders stops pretending to be some TV guy” and passes Medicare-for-All. Hassan insists David is Sanders in disguise, citing “same face, same voice, same angry about everything,” and barricaded himself behind the counter with three freshly pressed blazers. Witnesses say David spent forty minutes explaining impersonation, frantically cueing up SNL clips. “I’m not Bernie Sanders! I created Seinfeld!” he shouted through the window. Hassan slid over a petition on homemade letterhead: “You sign this, Senator, and I give you back your suits.” He listed family medical needs and accused “Hollywood makeup” of aiding a legislative flight. Customer Maria Rodriguez compared it to explaining wrestling isn’t real, noting David’s squinting and hand-waving “just made him look more like Bernie.” As of press time, Hassan remained barricaded, and David had called his agent, his lawyer, and Sanders’ office. “Do you think a sitting U.S. Senator picks up his own dry cleaning?” he said, calling it his most ridiculous crisis “since the swan.”